Even the sun sets in paradise

I raped the repeat on my playlist
-just for those words, just for those days
I struggled. Now struggle to understand,
how to let go of this pain. Days, its been-
yet wonder where are those times were flown.
where are those words drawn, once used to
be the bells heard, the closest to heaven; I said.
Walked the hard road which seems easy for those
who has not been, with a blade- faced straight
to the throat, on every step I took.
Oceans grew smaller at the days end-
which only left room for a scattered dream,
so flattered to deceive.
In a place where the reality and emotions collide,
we buried our love, life and-
the remainder of whats left in between,
whilst the molested playlist screamed
that 'even the sun sets in paradise'.
Indeed.

Hey you :)

A strangers gaze, that awkwardness and the known odds;
I think I understand the reason for the sharp edged words you spoke.
The closest I could've ever been was, a few inches apart;
but you were so far away for me to say what I have for you.
If a momentary contentment is the source that drives me,
I wouldn't ever fear 'rejection'; which now keeps me away from you.
I questioned me 'Why her?', and been told;
"Some questions have no answers and don't expect this to have any!"
Thus I am your stranger and you are the one I can't get my eyes off.

Dear Johnnie

Walk a mile in me shoes, dear Johnnie
Walk a mile, before us cubes get aged
On worn out soles of me flip flops
Though they no match for thee leather knee-highs
Walk a mile on this gravel road, dear Johnnie
And sight the stains on those dying sunsets
Which once used to be spectacular than this ginger ale
Purists may weep, Oh let ‘em scream, Johnnie
Cos the choice was mine, though it failed me
Veil her glare in your top hat and walk a mile,
On the lanes of pain, where the memories were slain
Fight the dawn with thy cane, dear Johnnie
Which I keen to see (not), before us next round!!

By Dilan Samathilake (alias Dilan daDevil)

 

The kiss of Judas

Oh thee lord of Nazareth.
Hear me, an assassin’s grieve
whilst the echo burns the walls
-of thy immortal realm;
as thee heaven refused to shelter
the being of us weakens.
Spare me, a few coins of silver
minus the ones with blood stains-dried,
red clots, set in the midst of
the thrones, the crown, the cross and thee.
Where the nails were; an inch deep
rests now the salvation we seek.
Speak Now! Voice thee reasons;
though seamless; seems us feelings.
the meanings are the ones we need of.
Redeemed by the grace and raised from the dead;
is it I? -for I’ve lost me faith. The doubts;
darker the soul grew; were concealed within.
The hour was at hand for many
but me, for I was blind.
Master is it I? It is.

By Dilan Samathilake (alias Dilan daDevil)

Chasing Rainbows

Cocktails were poured into her empty heart,
while Berlin bars sang her song.
As it echoed beyond
the war drums of ruthless Nazis;
she exhaled her sorrows into thin air.
Smoke, her dreams were to the naked eyes
of those who were foreign to love-lost betwixt,
too thick.Thicker than the ashes flew;
over the gas chambers, fake rainbows and many.
Confusions were bottled up within;
ready to be popped open to pour down like champagne
but corked well, so the frustation sustained;
stuck to the bottom
like a gunblade on a blood stained
heart. Hard but pain was eased
again, was pleased as she sipped her spirits,
spiritual! Her nonstop chatter released her greif
while her scattered heart sighed silently.
Her gown was the terrain that strangers walked
passing neon lights and name signs
vacant rooms and street lights.
'I am a princess' she thought
while counting notes given, souvenirs
of the night that she crowned him;
a stranger who was short stayed

By Dilan Samathilake (alias Dilan daDevil) 

So I never loved her

(Play the sound track before reading)

"Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow."

- William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, 2.2

His gaze was detained by the sorrow of the grey stained wall in front of him. “The greatest heaven is far away from me, I know” his words were whispers I felt, those which lost its right to speak. As he recalled the moments of his miserable life, he remembered what she has said once, once before the times have changed. Those were the days of his young life, he thought. If not mistaken was taken away by force, for the crimes that have never committed, but assumed guilty.

Oh Romeo, aren’t you just lucky? to surrender your soul to the undying love, once you’ve yearned to spend the eternity with, oh Romeo. You are blessed Romeo, that you’ve never got tortured from the love you adored. The lips you’ve once kissed, have they ever cursed you? Or the kiss itself a curse, oh tell me Romeo? For I’m lost by the own words I have written once, so tell me Romeo?

Oh Romeo, have you ever loved her, the way I’ve done? Haven't you ever bridged the day and the night, for the love of your life? Have you? Have you ever written songs for the sparkle of her eyes, tender in her skin or the love she had given, which you thought were real? Have you cried enough Romeo, for the distance and absence that failed you. Oh Romeo you are 'the lover', for you’ve died for the name of the love, and I still wonder what am I? Oh Romeo, tell me Oh Romeo why do I feel betrayed?.

Rest in peace Oh Romeo, for the love you’ve died for, while I die every day for what I thought was love. From the moment a shadow is born till the second it dies, what does remain is a hope, which I have lost in every step I take.

‘ I am no martyr of any cause’, he thought to himself, before walking away from his own shadow, to evade, as it followed him through the pale light of the burning candles. "They’ve lost their innocence"; he sang in silence by looking at those portraits of her, which lost the grace they once used to have. “How much I used to love you? more than my breath and being” .

Oh Romeo, So tell me, 'the greatest lover of all' ? Can I be a lover for that I am not dead but dying Oh Romeo?

By Dilan Samathilake

(Sound Track: There's no place like home Series: LOST Season 4 Composer: Michael Giacchino)

'තෘප්ති' A Film by Udara Abeysundara

'තෘප්ති'

Satisfaction

A film by Udara Abeysundara

Script by Dilan Dhananjaya Samathilake

‘සංතෘප්ති’ or as its English translation ‘satisfaction’ defines, is the state of being gratified or simply the pleasure obtained by a fulfilment of a need or a desire. This is an emotional state which is available to every living being, yet somewhat rarely experienced by most. Instead of living in the present with the life as it is at each moment, most of the individuals are habitually engaged in a frail struggle to preserve and uphold a false identity which separates the person from the whole of life has made ‘satisfaction’ a rare fragment in the pool of emotions.

‘සංතෘප්ති’ (-sa-n-thrup-thi- ) is a story of three different social entities which gain their contentment by contravening the modern social conduct with an emotional approach that suits its very moment. Each entity represents each and every customary bond that combines humans in a society and how they find their ultimate satisfaction, the happiness.

‘Kavindu’ is a young boy who seeks excitement by experience, yet grows under the rules and the supervision of his parents. The systematic way his mother follows to make a cake steals his interest which eventually leads him to an experiment. This guides to a disappointment of the anticipation and the desires of his mother which result a conflict and misery between them. In time, with the unconditional love towards the child of her life, she breaks the system after understanding ‘Kavindu’s experimenting nature and then satisfies her desires along with Kavindu’s; by taking a step towards the child’s world.

At the meantime ‘Sena’ and ‘Vishaka’, a newly wedded couple who are secluded from the outside, yet on a mission to discover the true self, await. Regardless the known odds of themselves, they try to satisfy themselves through comprehension and concession. After a struggle to identify the differences, they start to communicate in a non verbal manner which introduces to their inner desires. A mutual physical intimacy that allows both individuals to please the arising desires takes them in to a whole new level of maturity and understanding at the end.

Meanwhile, ‘Palitha’ a person who has lost his way in his own imagination seeks his true satisfaction through the scales of his own judgement which this society defies to value. Though there are no conflicts (since he is free from all bonds), he himself has to discover and overcome certain difficulties in order to be fulfilled. At last he finds the satisfaction and salvation that he has been searching in his self from some time.

The story concludes when the entities find what they have been seeking, and it’s the ultimate happiness of being fulfilled, which of course is the fact we all are living for.


Synopsis by D Samathilake

My Mind in a Box

A photo journalism project I'm working on as a part of my concept of creating an idea bank. All your feedback will be my sole encouragement in finding new patterns of creative representations. All the photographs were taken and manipulated by Dilan Dhananjaya Samathilake.

Disclaimer and privacy Notice: The information contained herein is for the sole purpose of commercial and entertainment. All information published online by DDS production group is subject to change without notice. All information, artwork, graphics, text, copy, data, and other material included in this Website is DDS production group’s or its licensor’s copyright material. All Material is protected in Australia by the Copyright Act 1968 and by applicable legislation in other jurisdictions. All rights not expressly granted by these Conditions of Use are reserved.The Material may not be reproduced, distributed, downloaded, uploaded, modified, adapted or communicated to the public in whole or in part without licensor’s permission.

The Stronghold

The Sun took its chance to blaze, when the wind overtook the pace of motionless clouds, as it wants to be even with the deep blue sky. The lonely railway tracks were the only companion the Ocean could have at this very moment, than all the blurred figures of lovers who were busy in their own worlds with their own passion. Though it was not heavenly the sound of crows broke the silence, as if to say that this world can’t ever be secluded from the rest.

Then there was she, a proven norm of feminism with a face full of sorrow, cheeks full of tears and a heart full of indecision. As she tried hard to avoid the gazes and frowns of the strangers who passed her by, it just made them more inquisitive. The pleasant look on her dress and the designer made hand bag was the only thing that differentiated her from a heartbroken prostitute. As she was looking at the endless ocean, she saw this detached calmness in each and every tide, and she wondered whether it’s the same sea that she has witnessed from the glass panel of her office. For a second she thought the horizon is miles away which she can run and hide herself within. The sudden roar of the train which passed behind her in a fraction of a second scattered the gloom which was building inside. She hasn’t felt the vibe this close, but it was closer to the brutal torture she was going through in everyday’s life.
She didn’t have strength even to stop her hair being played by this clumsy wind, so she let herself to be a mess. “What else more to be messed, when I’m a mess itself?” and the thoughts were echoing. She touched her right arm smoothly from top to bottom, not for the pleasure of course but to feel whether she is not dreaming. How anyone could picture this woman, in everyday’s life that can’t lift her eyelids to see this world as she’s scared of showing her tears? For the surprise that picture had her name written all over. When yesterday was a chaos, how can today be any better? She was recalling the moments from the past and they weren’t merrier than the present she’s living. The tender filled memories are what were missing in a broken heart. When the time passed her by and as the responsibilities grew, she became lost in her own dimensions. Now she has had enough being the stronghold of everything.

She is a victim of domestic violence; she is a victim of an emotional undertone and the list goes on and on. Her fringe is not lengthy enough to hide the scars now, hence she can grow her hair bit longer but that’s nowhere near a solution. The scattered heart is breathless after being hopeless for so many chaotic years. She was on the search of peace, when she had enough of seeking happiness and this is the last stand as she felt. She can’t take this for any longer her heart said. As she was sinking in the calmness of the deep blue sea the world was changing. For a second she lifted her chin and gazed at the world next to her and noticed that she’s not the centre of attention any more.

The barks of the stray dogs which were fighting over a dump took the attention of her conscious and she was lost in the sight. Fierce look on each of the dogs face were similar, so as the tails which were stuck between legs. The ‘survival of the strongest’ is not framed to the wild any more, as it shows clearly from the regular life of an ordinary being. She felt herself as a bitch who’s trying to protect her dignity, rights and the life from the cowardly hands of alcoholism and doubts of havoc. What if she stood against, not to knock herself back down again, but to raise her voice against the reason? Could be it is what was missing, or could be there’s something more. To her left was a couple walking on tracks, with a distance in between. Their hands weren’t tangled or they weren’t on the arms of each other, but the dying sun injected a dose of pale affection. The man was looking at the endless ocean as to find new horizons and the girls’ face was hidden under her palms as she can’t be satisfied by the endeavours of her lover anymore. She looked at him and said “So this is it” with a firm stare on her face. He was silent. His face said that he is wordless for a reason. Even the seconds paced slower than they used to, and she turned back and started walking away from him. He looked at her as she was fading away, with his dry numb eyes.

Any end is not the same as it has started; she drew some odd figures on the sand as she was looking at the guy who seemed so broken than the girl who was walking away. Some decisions have to make someday soon, the thoughts were pounding against the walls of her heart as she dreamt the moments of the judgement over the divorce. Yes, a Divorce. It’s worth millions than these tears, she felt. Though the thought was frustrating, it was not that painful as recalling the faces of her children who were disturbed by this continuous violence. A peaceful future for them, though her present was gone.

She untied the knot and took a bottle out the small paper bag that she was keeping from sometime. She gazed at it for few more seconds and threw it over the tracks. She stood still while thinking “there’s a lot more to live for than quitting this fight, everyday is a new day and its worth living”

A fallen hero....

~A short story by Dilan Dhananjaya Samathilake~

The golden rays of the sun, so as they purified the plain gloom in everyday’s dawn, were invading the darkness inside his old smoggy room by a step at a time. It was bit too early to embrace the glamour of the green, the sparkle of the sky or even the sounds of the earth; since the silence of pale white mist was standing against. He wiped the cob webs off the window above his shoulder which was built overnight, as he rested his arms on the dust filled window ledger. It was remarkable to notice, how these annoying creatures create intricacy inside an unique craft of art. Yes, It sounded ‘life’ to his ears and the visionary oversight.

He drank the last few drops of water that was left in his mug after gaggling. A firm grip over the clutches gave him the confidence to battle another day, to walk another crooked mile and to stand straight on this rope of sorrow. He wondered why ‘Kanthie’ gets late to take him to his daily shower at seven. Could be that she’s busy packing breakfast for kids, as ‘Ruwan’ the eldest sleeps till late almost every day, such a rebel he is.

Though it exists, the pride gained through the ultimate victory over the wasted 3 decades of blood stained war that had being happening, the sacrifices were made now have forgotten by the majority of this so called public. The memories of the fallen hero’s will remain unknown on those mountain high war memorials and in their loved ones hearts only. His dreams, hopes along with the future were scattered on the day that he became a victim of a deadly claymore attack in elephant pass, by putting an end to the great service he offered as a private. He was that fortunate to live to see the light of the sun of another day at least with an eye. Though the scars on the face, wounds on the upper limb what was left and the lost index figure of the right hand healed, the scars of the mind remained the same. The desperation was all over the place, even on those million odd cigarette butts that were lying down in the ash tray. Then another cigarette started to burn.

The pictures in his head were linked together; the whispers of tears were what was missing. Every picture said a story, literally they anxiously screamed. He struggled in his memories to find a day where he smiled for real, hoped for the best or at least a day that he made his beloved wife satisfied. The giggles, pleasure, lust and sex were long gone, he was not that strong to trace back at those with its own risk. He has witnessed through pass 3 years how ‘Kanthie’became the ultimate woman, out of her chrysalis of her own childishness, immaturity and dependency. Even she took the motherhood by surprise, and now he couldn't believe how she handles being the ultimate father and mother at the same time. The sexual pleasure is what she has given up already, or at least his conscious doesn’t want to believe that she’s cheating on him.The compassion has become a trauma and the remedy is unknown. It’s not the same, the way his 7 year old used to smile with him. There’s disgust buried in her gestures as he has noticed. could be the scars on the limp made him a villain whom she has seen in those Cinderella stories,just evenly evil and ugly. Not that he is strong to avoid tears but as Kanthie said shes way too small to understand the reality and the sacrifices made for an entire nations’ tomorrow.

As he was looking at the morning sun he wondered about the lives which sleep peacefully at night, the relaxed minds of the people who ran from errands due to the prank calls even about fake bomb blasts and the happiness of the people who have mourned for their lost. After all, his sacrifice made that all happen, though he was left as a disabled, or as a differently able. He butt his half burnt cigarette on the tray and took the book on the chest of drawers to the hand, and started reading it. As chapters change so as the life, he felt.

the reason is what hurts the most....

Leave this pain aside, besides it’s now over

And now it’s over, yes its over

And the days have blown away above these boarders

Beneath this boredom, pain gets closer

Once there was a time that I’d battle this ocean

Coz you were the reason that once made me stronger

That made me stronger...

But now that reason is what hurts the most

the reason is what hurts the most....

What I’m seeing is, this empty seat beside me

but the feeling gets harder than the war

What now I believe is what’s left from (the) disaster

and that reason is what hurts the most....

(chorus)

There are two sides for every story

But always there’s a side left untold

There’s an end for every journey

but some break at its own dawn

and there are two sides for every story

but my side is yet untold

but my side is yet untold...

For all what we were, on those days full of laughter

These wounds stand it’s pride till you’re gone

Some questions stay with, no certain answers

but the reason is what hurts the most...

but now that reason is what hurts the most

that reason is what hurts the most....

There are two sides for every story

but always there’s a side left untold

There’s an end for every journey

but some break at its own dawn

And there are two sides for every story

but my side is yet untold ..

but my side is yet untold....

- Dilan 'DaDevil' Samathilake

you are my dawning new age....

Life was.....

That tenderness now lost and gone
No Caring hearts in unknown zones
Melting words in frozen dawns
Can’t recall them coz it’s far too long…

My pain, my sorrow, my tearless groans
Can they feel it, my deceitful moans?
Dramatic preface, to a lost tale of fall
Just another clown in a hopeless show…

Face full of smiles, that’s what they see
Happiness of vague, faked rainbow dream
Bloodshed eyes, with tears about to flee
Pain above fears, please set me free

The words I share, all my time No spare
The tender and care, won’t return unfair
Just a frown or stare, if goes wrong just rare
It’s still unfair, my pain!! You dare!!

now...

Only just an angel, from farthest north
Hail upon heaven, to protect this soul
How deep this dawn, hey love, do you know??
You are the only one who can stop this fall

Beyond your sweetness...

Forbidden indeed, you are
Than the gust that blows
Above forsaken lands.....
But to tell you
It’s Not beyond that
Sweetness you stand...

Incessant love, it belongs to hearts
Which deserve that absolute compassion
The desire to be free under these rainbow dreams
The hearts which meant to be till eternity
To tell you
You, my lost piece of a life full of adversity
Which now the fountain of happiness, No odds
But just a simple, new ascending solace
Yes I know, thee Love ceaseless
Will look in to you, when the time stops
For a moment, and till its long gone
I will never take mine off from yours
Will huddle in your heart, both hands wide open
Will held you still like wind in the deepest night
Till the memories of the tear dies
Till wind blows past all my skies
Cos I love you..
..and ....
Forbidden indeed, you are
Than the gust that blows
Above forsaken lands.....
But to tell you
It’s Not beyond that
Sweetness you stand...

Tell me just why, oh pretty thing........

Tell me just why, oh pretty thing
This difference of today from tomorrow
Tell me just why, oh pretty thing
This distance of yesterday from sorrow

Darkness on my way, these stars kept on falling
Scars on my fate, my past I was leaving
For days in this pain, all my time I was dwelling
Can’t I just say - Once loved a tear for healing….??

Crawled down in this closet, a new corner then found
No devotions or motions on those walls or grounds
Not a heaven indeed, un-smoothed edge unbound
Can’t I just say - Once loved a knock, for its sound….??

To fade away to a sunset, when winds stand against
Desires to demise, in depths of blue sway
Was lost in this mist, for once in million days
Once loved this mirage, not knowing it’s fake

You my smiles, so why praise tears for more
You my heaven, till I breath no more
You the truth I’m living, why doubts of dawns
This love it’s my soul, please don’t ask for more

Tell me just why, oh pretty thing
Difference of today from tomorrow
Tell me just why, oh pretty thing
Distance of yesterday from sorrow

The betrayed devotion

Just drain my blood, from feeble veins
Erase these stories, and now these stains
The vibes I’ve lost, the notions gained
Strip my skin, for that love I’ve laid …….

Difference, I know it’s different, indeed
Don’t stab my present, my scars of screams
You just nobody, not somebody at least
Hatred, an option, but don’t make me see

One thing in life, I will regret for ages
For fallen in love, and its all mistaken
Shame on tears, then smiles were taken
Don’t bold it now, the betrayed devotion

I should cut my hands, for the help I gave
I should rip my heart, for the love I’ve laid
I should slay my moments, for the stolen days
I ditched my vessel, years back on waves

Why No Homo...

This line so slim, betwixt right and wrong
Love has shapes, being Sapphic is a form
Truth lies beneath, but the change unknown
A woman on a woman, not a start of a storm

If obedience for cure; can sin causes shame?
If marriage is love, does it matter being same?
If you see some light, when you’ve lost in shades
Will you ever stand, just by letting it fade?

Life and desire, on this ground which is cursed
Vibes now relevant, is this lust your thirst?
Picture the love. not sex; why being gay so worse
Don’t stab your own, coz no pain to burst

This blood on veins, and this flesh I stand
For the right no wrong, till this life expands
No my battles, this for you to understand
Why no homo, when see the truth, on hands.

[ Will this ever be revealed?
Or will be hidden till deceased…
If it’s your own, what do you feel?
About being same, and discrete ]

My beautiful relief..

Picture this perfect, but I’m still on the sketch
These tears may color, only dream that left
To rest on her lap, till all seconds may melt
Those tears I drew; please let me confess

My clock seems long, ticks below even slow
It’s hard just to wait, even the pulse grows small
When thee on arms, even just before my dawns
Just one more minute, that’s only what I want

On a day sky falls, on a day sun would sink
On a day moon dies then the stars may blink
Will take you to hands, and keep close to my heart
Then this hail won’t fall, coz this love my start

Please, just let these tears keep on falling
Here now, it’s just a beautiful relief
Heavy heart, from this distanced love
With this wish of flying beyond seas.................

The Comment

Night is still young, haunting indeed
Whispers of silence, you sure?? not screams?
Mind as the wind, revolving for needs
Let me tell you this, dawn regains it’s deeds
Insane you called me, insane I am
Devil!! no angel, under the sky of cyan
Intentions just pure, No tensions of ramp
Just messed it little bit, coz that’s what I am…
Songs of the rain, Hues of the vain
A kiss under the drizzle, that’s what it’d say
Secrets of the wind, the fears I have laid
World is not colored, yet it is a stain
Simple this life, complex you make
Unless it made, the phantom of fake
Boredom or solace, either it’s lame
YET haven’t cried, the Lords name in vain
“Though the whispers, may be from the heaven
Or deceptive blast from the hell”
Does it really matter, or is it just the same
Riddle what I call, life; face it though insane
Never meant to break, the softness of your gaze
Thy No stranger and never will be
Place you belong?? its just for me
Insane you call me, apology no need
Coz that’s what they call me
I’m Sorry It’s ME ee

Appachchi..

Underneath those tearless eyes-
-was a sensitive heart in hidden
Way beyond that senseless gaze
The love you’d carried, why still forbidden?
Even you tried not to show
The sleepless nights stood awake
Till I’ve dreamt my dream
thee never looked down on my faith
Even you tried best to hide
The doubts in your veins
All countless tears you’ve shed
Just to draw smiles on this face
Even you tried best to stand
My words, dropped against
Saw that wetness on eyes
Then it was hard to sustain
Still this darkness in dawns
This haze on my dusk
It’s being years since it’s gone
My light, beyond the gust

Underneath those tearless eyes-
-was a sensitive heart in hidden
Way beyond that senseless gaze
The love you’d carried, why still forbidden?

When the words are not enough

Wish I knew a way to close my eyes
To end these sleepless nights
Just to dream her by my side…..
Just to hold her arms till light…

Wish I knew a way to fake these vibes
When this thunder struck my mind
Just to feel this love inside
Ohh I feel her love inside…..

May be its too late
These tears now falling down
Never meant to leave this part of town
Never meant to leave this love I’ve found
May be someday
When you chase these broken doubts
I’m gonna make my stand on ground
Never meant to leave this love I’ve found
Never gonna leave that love I’ve found

One day it’ll be the end of fallen skies
And the rain will soak these lies
So shall we keep all these pain behind?
To walk this distance across these tides

Wish I knew a way to close my eyes
Just to dream her by my side…..
Wish I knew a way to fake these vibes
Just to feel that love inside

May be its too late
These tears now falling down
Never meant to leave this part of town
Never meant to leave this love I’ve found
May be someday
When you can chase these broken doubts
I’m gonna make my stand on ground
Never meant to leave this love I’ve found
Never gonna leave that love I’ve found